There comes a time in one’s life when, without a hint of warning, you know yourself. It is a eureka moment – a time when you can anticipate and even foretell your own reactions and, no matter how hard you may try, there is a consistency, a predictability in your approach; in other words, this becomes your ‘practice’. Contrary to what you might have been told, practice does not make perfect – rather, it makes permanent. We are, after all, creatures of habit.
In case you were wondering, how long does it actually take to form a new habit or to change an existing one? Pause for a moment. How long, do you think? The answer that follows is backed by science. The answer to the ultimate question of life, the universe and everything is 42. Well, this is what Douglas Adams says in The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. The answer, as far as habits are concerned, is halve of that – 21.
This was first observed in the 1950s by plastic surgeon Maxwell Maltz. He noticed a strange pattern among his patients. Following an operation, it took a patient 21 days to get used to their new face, or frame, and exactly the same day count for a patient who had a body part amputated to adjust to their new circumstances. He wrote in his 1960s book, Psycho-Cybernetics: “These, and many other commonly observed phenomena, tend to show that it requires a minimum of about 21 days for an old mental image to dissolve and a new one to jell.” For a behaviour to become automatic, it takes 66 days.
The thing is that I have been desperately trying to change some habits, and one habit in particular. For as long as I can remember, my grandmother on my mother’s side would tell me that I was a crusader for lost causes and desperate cases. Little did I know then that there is a Patron Saint of lost causes and desperate cases. He was one of Jesus’ apostles. His name is Judas Thaddaeus, and he should not be confused with Judas Iscariot, the apostle who later betrayed Jesus.
I tend to take on lost causes. If I had to offer reasons for my behaviour, they would centre on my tendency to favour the underdog, which I squarely blame on the allure of the underdog. This is supported by a significant body of research that suggests that we tend to be more compassionate about disadvantaged individuals, particularly those we perceive to have been disadvantaged unfairly.
The thing is just that there are many individuals who revel in being considered an underdog when, in fact, they are anything but.
As I write, the supposed founder of Facebook tries, seemingly successfully so, to convince the US government that he is but a victim of circumstances. This is despite the fact that he is unable to name a single competitor to his all-conquering company. A billionaire who can cause, and has caused, real harm to billions of people is portraying himself, and convincingly so, as a victim.
It is on days like these that I contemplate South Africa – what it was and what it has become. It is, on reflection, a lost cause from an economic viewpoint, as opposed to an economic underdog. The cure for its recovery would require us to rethink our focus on lost causes and desperate cases.
All this reminds me of the tenth- biggest song of all time, released in August 1968. It was the first single from the Beatles’ record label, Apple Records. If you have not listened to the song for some time, you should do so: “Hey Jude, don’t make it bad; take a sad song and make it better; Remember to let her under your skin; Then you’ll begin to make it; Better better better better better better, oh; Nah nah nah nah nah nah, nah nah nah, hey Jude.”